Last Sunday in Wichita, Kansas, Scott Roeder killed Dr. George Tiller in the foyer of Tiller’s Reformation Lutheran Church with a single gunshot. Tiller was one of a very few doctors in the US whose practice specialized in late-term abortions.
This was not the first time that radical anti-abortionists had attacked Tiller. In 1986, Tiller’s clinic was bombed without human injuries. In 1993, he was shot by an abortion activist who remains in prison for the attack. His clinic has been an ongoing scene of protests. Tiller was radically committed to the practice of abortions. He was among those who had no conscience against the despicable practice of “partial-birth abortion.” In my view, he was a mass murderer, a high-tech hit man. For $5000 he would kill any baby in any woman’s womb. It would probably shock us to see the number of not-yet-born people he put to death.
Last Sunday, Dr. Tiller met someone who was as radical as he, another killer. The difference is that Kansas law approved Dr. Tiller’s acts of murder; it did not approve Mr. Roeder’s. I have no complaint regarding Kansas law regarding Mr. Roeder. In my opinion, he should be tried, convicted, and punished for his act of murder. My problem with Kansas law is that it approved Dr. Tiller’s acts of murder.
Obviously, I am absolutely opposed to Dr. Tiller’s work. I have no respect for the man. I have no respect for his kind of Christianity. I wonder what it was like for him to meet his Maker. Did Heaven view him as a hero coming home?
Thankfully, we do live in a land of law and order. Thus, Mr. Roeder had no right to take the law into his own hands. I would never advocate or support this. I do believe, however, that the state of the law in America regarding abortion is a very real factor in the death of Dr. Tiller.
Law only defines what is legal versus what is illegal in a society. It does not necessarily define right and wrong. Unfortunately, many people do not realize this; they assume that anything that is legal is also right to do. When there is substantial difference between that which is legal in a society and that which is truly right, conflict can be intense. In such situations, radicals are naturally attracted into the fray. If the law were on the right side of this issue, Dr. Tiller would probably not have been performing abortions. He could have employed his skills in a constructive manner, to serve life rather than destroy it. And, if Dr. Tiller insisted on performing abortions anyway, he could then be put in prison.
Already underway is an attempt to connect Mr. Roeder with people like me. Mr. Roeder and I evidently shared a common view of abortion, but we didn’t share a common view of life. Trust me, if even one percent of us who are pro-life activists reasoned like Mr. Roeder, we would be hearing of abortion clinic attacks, and assaults on abortionists weekly. And the fact that Mr. Tiller was killed in his own church, shows that there would be no safe place for abortionists from determined killers like Mr. Roeder.
I honestly believe that part of the blame for Tiller’s death can be placed on the many Americans who have right opinions about abortion, but lack real convictions about it. The pro-choice, actually pro-abortion, crowd has convictions. They have pushed for the laws that exist. If you are pro-life, don’t do what Mr. Roeder did; but by all means, do something for the unborn. Get informed. Peacefully protest. Contact your government representatives. Vote.
Have you put this blog in your favorites yet?
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Death Sucks
“Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints”, according to Psalm 116:15. That is a view of death from heaven’s perspective. Now for a view from down here on planet earth: death sucks!
For about 10 days now I have been adjusting to the death of a friend, just five years older than me, who died suddenly of a heart attack. Ted had had heart trouble for about 15 years. In fact, just over two months ago he was talking with me about the fact that the doctors originally told him that he MIGHT live another 10 years with his serious heart condition. In March, it seemed he would live several more years. It has been hard to believe that he is gone for good.
Now, I believe that my friend is in a better place, an incredibly better place. But I am not. I am still in THIS place, and now with one less friend.
I’m glad to know that my friend, Ted Self, lived to honor Jesus with his life. I just wish he could have stayed here honoring Him with us much longer.
I’m really glad he didn’t have to suffer long in his parting. I just wish he could have parted without much suffering in 2014 or so.
We can try to see things from God’s perspective. We should try to see things from God’s perspective. It is the most healthy perspective. Still, it is not our only perspective, nor even our most impressive perspective. As I honestly attempt to view my friends passing as a “precious” occasion, I must honestly admit that his death on May 16th, 2009 sucked to me. I know that heaven gained; but we certainly lost. And I know that heaven’s gain is more important than our loss. But our loss is not, therefore, unimportant. I lost a real friend. And that sucks!
Someday, perhaps sooner than I hope and sooner than my friends and family expect, I will experience what God views as precious. I will come home – home to the Land of Friends. You see, I am a friend of God. So was Ted. I hope to see you there someday.
For about 10 days now I have been adjusting to the death of a friend, just five years older than me, who died suddenly of a heart attack. Ted had had heart trouble for about 15 years. In fact, just over two months ago he was talking with me about the fact that the doctors originally told him that he MIGHT live another 10 years with his serious heart condition. In March, it seemed he would live several more years. It has been hard to believe that he is gone for good.
Now, I believe that my friend is in a better place, an incredibly better place. But I am not. I am still in THIS place, and now with one less friend.
I’m glad to know that my friend, Ted Self, lived to honor Jesus with his life. I just wish he could have stayed here honoring Him with us much longer.
I’m really glad he didn’t have to suffer long in his parting. I just wish he could have parted without much suffering in 2014 or so.
We can try to see things from God’s perspective. We should try to see things from God’s perspective. It is the most healthy perspective. Still, it is not our only perspective, nor even our most impressive perspective. As I honestly attempt to view my friends passing as a “precious” occasion, I must honestly admit that his death on May 16th, 2009 sucked to me. I know that heaven gained; but we certainly lost. And I know that heaven’s gain is more important than our loss. But our loss is not, therefore, unimportant. I lost a real friend. And that sucks!
Someday, perhaps sooner than I hope and sooner than my friends and family expect, I will experience what God views as precious. I will come home – home to the Land of Friends. You see, I am a friend of God. So was Ted. I hope to see you there someday.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
It's not About Your Paygrade!
Our President dodged questions about abortion craftily during his campaign. I don't get paid even as much as Senator Obama did at the time he made that statement. At a recent press conference, a reporter asked him if he had an opinion on the beginning of life in the womb now that his pay had increased. He craftily dodged that question, too. I have written an article on abortion that I think is worth reading for every American with the slightest concern over the practice of abortion in our land, and the fact that Obama's administration is determined to expand the practice.
Don't be deceived by the double-talk. "We want to reduce the need for abortions." If there is nothing wrong with abortion, why worry about how many are performed? Conversely, if there is something wrong with the practice, why do we sanction it? I hope you take time to read my article at http://searchwarp.com/swa481510-Its-No-Fairytale.htm
It's really not about your paygrade; it's about facing the truth.
Don't be deceived by the double-talk. "We want to reduce the need for abortions." If there is nothing wrong with abortion, why worry about how many are performed? Conversely, if there is something wrong with the practice, why do we sanction it? I hope you take time to read my article at http://searchwarp.com/swa481510-Its-No-Fairytale.htm
It's really not about your paygrade; it's about facing the truth.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Consider the Birds
We feed birds at our house. Have for years. Lately, I have been thinking about these birds as well as feeding them and watching them.
First, they are marvelous little creatures. What I have found somewhat perplexing is that these birds have no awareness of the fact that I am feeding them. I go to the feed store and buy the 50# bags of seed. I go to the garage and get one of the five gallon buckets I store the seed in, carry it to the feeders, and refill them when needed. The birds are apparently clueless that they have someone looking out for them - me.
I know that I can’t expect these birds to thank me. If I could make one request, however, it would be this: "After you have eaten the nice food I put out for you, please don’t go sit on the branches of that tree over my car and relieve yourself." Seems like the least they could do.
As long as I have been feeding the birds in our neighborhood, I do wish they would recognize me as a friend, not a threat. Every time I walk around the corner of the house where the feeders are, they fly off. Sometimes I talk to them as they fly away. I say, “Don’t you know that I am the one who put the feeder there, the one who puts those delicious seeds in it? You don’t need to fly away!” They, of course, never get it.
God has been speaking to me lately in these experiences. It goes something like this: “You don’t get it, either, son. I take care of you and the birds. Are you not as oblivious to my provision at times as they are of yours?”
The Spirit brought to my mind these words of Jesus recently, too: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” (MT 6:25-27 emphasis mine).
In this day of economic uncertainty, I am choosing to “look at the birds”, remember that they are not sweating where their next meal is coming from or how they will make it through their remaining years. I am choosing to believe that I am “much more valuable” than those birds are to my heavenly Father. Want to join me?
First, they are marvelous little creatures. What I have found somewhat perplexing is that these birds have no awareness of the fact that I am feeding them. I go to the feed store and buy the 50# bags of seed. I go to the garage and get one of the five gallon buckets I store the seed in, carry it to the feeders, and refill them when needed. The birds are apparently clueless that they have someone looking out for them - me.
I know that I can’t expect these birds to thank me. If I could make one request, however, it would be this: "After you have eaten the nice food I put out for you, please don’t go sit on the branches of that tree over my car and relieve yourself." Seems like the least they could do.
As long as I have been feeding the birds in our neighborhood, I do wish they would recognize me as a friend, not a threat. Every time I walk around the corner of the house where the feeders are, they fly off. Sometimes I talk to them as they fly away. I say, “Don’t you know that I am the one who put the feeder there, the one who puts those delicious seeds in it? You don’t need to fly away!” They, of course, never get it.
God has been speaking to me lately in these experiences. It goes something like this: “You don’t get it, either, son. I take care of you and the birds. Are you not as oblivious to my provision at times as they are of yours?”
The Spirit brought to my mind these words of Jesus recently, too: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?” (MT 6:25-27 emphasis mine).
In this day of economic uncertainty, I am choosing to “look at the birds”, remember that they are not sweating where their next meal is coming from or how they will make it through their remaining years. I am choosing to believe that I am “much more valuable” than those birds are to my heavenly Father. Want to join me?
Thursday, May 14, 2009
From a PRINCE to a FROG
I was changed from a PRINCE to a FROG, and this by a kiss. It may sound like a fairytale run backwards, but it’s not. It describes a real-life transformation I experienced over 35 years ago through Jesus Christ.
At 26 years old I was a PRINCE, a Pompous, Rebellious, Ignoramus, Not Considering Eternity. That year, however, I met (and more than met) Jesus, the Son of God. I became a FROG, one who Fully Relies On God.
As a PRINCE, I was not an especially evil person. I had never committed any crime worthy of even the threat of prison. I had a reputation as a good worker, a pleasant neighbor, and generally a pretty nice guy. No one, including myself, knew how pride-filled I was.
Though I battled low self-esteem, I hid the battle with various masks. It’s a mistake to think that, because we think lowly of ourselves, we do not think too much of ourselves. Indeed, one can think too much of himself quantitatively as well as qualitatively. And I did. As an example, I typically treated others with kindness and deference, not because I viewed them especially worthy of honor, but rather that I hoped they would think well of me.
Though compliant by nature, I had become an accomplished rebel by age 26. I was like the son Jesus spoke of in a parable whose father asked him to go work in the field. This son said, “sure, Dad”, but he never went(MT 21:28). Social scientists call this “passive-aggressive behavior”. It is the behavior of choice for nice rebels.
For years I have been discovering what an ignoramus I was. At 26 I thought I knew plenty, but discovered that I was mistaken about so much and ignorant about much more. I had no clue that my personal struggles were as common as they are. I didn’t know who God was or even who I was. I knew hardly anything about world history, philosophy, theology, psychology and sociology. I had never read more than a few verses of the Bible. I had heard my country’s experience referred to as a “democratic experiment.” I didn’t know then that the Soviet Union, which most Americans feared in that day, was an even younger experiment, an experiment in atheistic communism. I couldn’t even imagine we would all see it collapse within two decades.
I still don’t know much, but I believe a few things with a deep and abiding conviction; and these faith-tenets have profoundly altered the course of my life over the past three decades and offer a remarkable hope for eternity.
Where at 26 I had lived NOT CONSIDERING ETERNITY, I have since lived with eternity on my mind. I discovered that “God has put eternity in our hearts” (Eccl 3:11), and have come to believe that the devil works diligently to keep it out of our minds. There in my mid-twenties, I adopted a radically new and thoroughly biblical orientation to life; I began to “submit to God and resist the devil” (Jas 4:7). I became a FROG – Fully Relying On God.
I choose to rely on God, not myself, not a job, not a nest-egg, neither church nor state, neither professor nor politician. I rely on God to save me, heal me, teach me, lead me, provide for me, and protect me.
Let me tell you about the kiss that wrought this transformation. Psalm 2:12 says, “Kiss the Son lest he be angry with you and you be destroyed in your way . . . blessed are all who take refuge in him” [emphasis mine]. One of the clear claims of Christ was that He was and is the Son of God. He was the Word of God that “became flesh and lived among us” (JN 1). He was the Son who said, “If you have seen Me, you have seen the Father” (JN 14:9). This Son was the “radiance of God’s glory and the exact representation of His being” (HEB 1). He is the One in whom “[dwelt] all the fullness of the Godhead bodily” (Col 2:9).
The kiss in the second Psalm is metaphorical rather than literal. It is a kiss of the heart, not of the lips. Thus, it is a kiss of devotion and affection. Judas, the betrayer of Jesus, kissed him, but his was a deceptive kiss. Judas kissed with his lips but not with his heart. The kiss which transforms is not deceptive. Though it may be done publicly it is not done essentially for others to see; it is a pure act of devotion between the one who kisses and the Kissed One.
I first kissed Jesus in public. I attended a revival meeting where my heart had been touched by the evangelist’s words and I responded to his plea. It was a very emotional time, for me and for many others. The next day, however, driving to work in a very non-emotional contemplation of my revival-night decision, I kissed the Son again. I told Him that I really wanted to be fully His – not half, not even mostly, but fully His.
My life in Christ has not been blissful, but it has been blessed. The truth is, some of my most painful life experiences have happened in the past three decades. Following Jesus has not been easy. I have endured trials that formed such dark oppressive clouds over my life that the Son’s Light was blocked from me, yet I have lived to see His Light overcome that darkness and shine on me again. I have been despised, rejected, and abandoned. I have been misunderstood, maligned, and marginalized. None of that, however, matters as much as this: I have been accepted, embraced, and found useful to the Master.
If you have not understood my point, let me make it clear. I am glad to be a Christian. And when I suffer as a Christian, I’m grateful to bear His name (1 Pet 4:16). Here in the 21st Century, Jesus is still calling people. His call is simple: “Come, follow Me.” I encourage you to get acquainted with the Son and kiss Him with your heart.
At 26 years old I was a PRINCE, a Pompous, Rebellious, Ignoramus, Not Considering Eternity. That year, however, I met (and more than met) Jesus, the Son of God. I became a FROG, one who Fully Relies On God.
As a PRINCE, I was not an especially evil person. I had never committed any crime worthy of even the threat of prison. I had a reputation as a good worker, a pleasant neighbor, and generally a pretty nice guy. No one, including myself, knew how pride-filled I was.
Though I battled low self-esteem, I hid the battle with various masks. It’s a mistake to think that, because we think lowly of ourselves, we do not think too much of ourselves. Indeed, one can think too much of himself quantitatively as well as qualitatively. And I did. As an example, I typically treated others with kindness and deference, not because I viewed them especially worthy of honor, but rather that I hoped they would think well of me.
Though compliant by nature, I had become an accomplished rebel by age 26. I was like the son Jesus spoke of in a parable whose father asked him to go work in the field. This son said, “sure, Dad”, but he never went(MT 21:28). Social scientists call this “passive-aggressive behavior”. It is the behavior of choice for nice rebels.
For years I have been discovering what an ignoramus I was. At 26 I thought I knew plenty, but discovered that I was mistaken about so much and ignorant about much more. I had no clue that my personal struggles were as common as they are. I didn’t know who God was or even who I was. I knew hardly anything about world history, philosophy, theology, psychology and sociology. I had never read more than a few verses of the Bible. I had heard my country’s experience referred to as a “democratic experiment.” I didn’t know then that the Soviet Union, which most Americans feared in that day, was an even younger experiment, an experiment in atheistic communism. I couldn’t even imagine we would all see it collapse within two decades.
I still don’t know much, but I believe a few things with a deep and abiding conviction; and these faith-tenets have profoundly altered the course of my life over the past three decades and offer a remarkable hope for eternity.
Where at 26 I had lived NOT CONSIDERING ETERNITY, I have since lived with eternity on my mind. I discovered that “God has put eternity in our hearts” (Eccl 3:11), and have come to believe that the devil works diligently to keep it out of our minds. There in my mid-twenties, I adopted a radically new and thoroughly biblical orientation to life; I began to “submit to God and resist the devil” (Jas 4:7). I became a FROG – Fully Relying On God.
I choose to rely on God, not myself, not a job, not a nest-egg, neither church nor state, neither professor nor politician. I rely on God to save me, heal me, teach me, lead me, provide for me, and protect me.
Let me tell you about the kiss that wrought this transformation. Psalm 2:12 says, “Kiss the Son lest he be angry with you and you be destroyed in your way . . . blessed are all who take refuge in him” [emphasis mine]. One of the clear claims of Christ was that He was and is the Son of God. He was the Word of God that “became flesh and lived among us” (JN 1). He was the Son who said, “If you have seen Me, you have seen the Father” (JN 14:9). This Son was the “radiance of God’s glory and the exact representation of His being” (HEB 1). He is the One in whom “[dwelt] all the fullness of the Godhead bodily” (Col 2:9).
The kiss in the second Psalm is metaphorical rather than literal. It is a kiss of the heart, not of the lips. Thus, it is a kiss of devotion and affection. Judas, the betrayer of Jesus, kissed him, but his was a deceptive kiss. Judas kissed with his lips but not with his heart. The kiss which transforms is not deceptive. Though it may be done publicly it is not done essentially for others to see; it is a pure act of devotion between the one who kisses and the Kissed One.
I first kissed Jesus in public. I attended a revival meeting where my heart had been touched by the evangelist’s words and I responded to his plea. It was a very emotional time, for me and for many others. The next day, however, driving to work in a very non-emotional contemplation of my revival-night decision, I kissed the Son again. I told Him that I really wanted to be fully His – not half, not even mostly, but fully His.
My life in Christ has not been blissful, but it has been blessed. The truth is, some of my most painful life experiences have happened in the past three decades. Following Jesus has not been easy. I have endured trials that formed such dark oppressive clouds over my life that the Son’s Light was blocked from me, yet I have lived to see His Light overcome that darkness and shine on me again. I have been despised, rejected, and abandoned. I have been misunderstood, maligned, and marginalized. None of that, however, matters as much as this: I have been accepted, embraced, and found useful to the Master.
If you have not understood my point, let me make it clear. I am glad to be a Christian. And when I suffer as a Christian, I’m grateful to bear His name (1 Pet 4:16). Here in the 21st Century, Jesus is still calling people. His call is simple: “Come, follow Me.” I encourage you to get acquainted with the Son and kiss Him with your heart.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Calling on Jesus
On its landing approach to the airport in Buffalo on February 12th, Continental Connection Flight 3407 stalled and crashed into a residence. All 49 on the plane and one person on the ground died that day. The National Transportation Safety Board released the transcript of the cockpit voice recorder today. An Associated Press report on that transcript says that the pilot’s last words were “Jesus Christ!”.
As I read this, I could not help but wonder about the meaning of that utterance from a man who knew he was about to die. Understand this: I am making no judgment of the man or his faith. I do not know anything about him beyond what was reported.
I see two possible meanings to this utterance with a world of difference between them. The first meaning would be that of a believer crying out to his Lord in a moment of crisis. I have contemplated a crash of a plane upon which I was a passenger. I imagined that, if I had a few seconds before I would die, I would passionately cry out to my Lord Jesus. The second meaning is terribly unfortunate and terribly common. That “Jesus Christ” is an expletive. If that was the pilot’s meaning, he might as well have shouted, “holy sh_ _!”.
Proverbs 18:10 says, “The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe.” For the name of the Lord to be a strong tower, a place of spiritual safety, that name must be properly used. It cannot be used in just any manner. If I don’t like what is on my TV, I can pick up the remote control and change the channel (well, I’m a man, so I probably don’t have to pick it up; I’m already holding it). I could also eliminate the objectionable content on the TV screen by throwing that remote through the screen. Just as how I use the remote can make great difference, how I use the name of the Lord makes an even greater difference.
Jesus Christ is not a curse word; He is Lord of all. The Bible tells of a day when “every knee shall bow” at that Wonderful Name (Phil 2:10). If you have not yet done so, I encourage you to get to know this Lord Jesus and call on His Name in the way that saves. By all means, don’t wait until your final few seconds to cry out to Him. Desperation is now! The Savior awaits the earnest cry of your heart.
As I read this, I could not help but wonder about the meaning of that utterance from a man who knew he was about to die. Understand this: I am making no judgment of the man or his faith. I do not know anything about him beyond what was reported.
I see two possible meanings to this utterance with a world of difference between them. The first meaning would be that of a believer crying out to his Lord in a moment of crisis. I have contemplated a crash of a plane upon which I was a passenger. I imagined that, if I had a few seconds before I would die, I would passionately cry out to my Lord Jesus. The second meaning is terribly unfortunate and terribly common. That “Jesus Christ” is an expletive. If that was the pilot’s meaning, he might as well have shouted, “holy sh_ _!”.
Proverbs 18:10 says, “The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe.” For the name of the Lord to be a strong tower, a place of spiritual safety, that name must be properly used. It cannot be used in just any manner. If I don’t like what is on my TV, I can pick up the remote control and change the channel (well, I’m a man, so I probably don’t have to pick it up; I’m already holding it). I could also eliminate the objectionable content on the TV screen by throwing that remote through the screen. Just as how I use the remote can make great difference, how I use the name of the Lord makes an even greater difference.
Jesus Christ is not a curse word; He is Lord of all. The Bible tells of a day when “every knee shall bow” at that Wonderful Name (Phil 2:10). If you have not yet done so, I encourage you to get to know this Lord Jesus and call on His Name in the way that saves. By all means, don’t wait until your final few seconds to cry out to Him. Desperation is now! The Savior awaits the earnest cry of your heart.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Fix the Family
One day I was listening to the Glen Beck radio program. Here is what I heard Glen say that day, “Fix the family and you fix almost everything that is wrong with America.” Glen often jokes about having A.D.D., and it may not be a joke. At any rate, within a sentence or two, he was off to a different subject. My mind, however, was fixed on that insightful comment.
My oldest son turned 40 this past week. Yes, that makes me feel my age. Through Steve’s whole life, the institution of the family has been under assault in America. First, divorce has broken most marriages in his lifetime. And most of these broken marriages involved children. Many, if not most, of the people from the broken marriages with children eventually remarried. Thus, blended families (made up of children that are yours and mine, or yours, mine, and ours) have become commonplace over this 40 years.
Add to this social change the massive move of women into the workplace. When I grew up, it was common that moms were at home when the children were there. For the past decade or more, that situation has reversed. Now it is the exception rather than the rule that there is a stay-at-home parent. Don’t get me wrong here: I intend no assault on women who choose a career and children. Some parents juggle the responsibilities of two careers and family life pretty well. I personally know some who do. Still, it is no small challenge; and frankly, a high percentage of parents in these situations fail to adequately address the needs of their children. As a result, these children muddle their way through childhood and carry the damage of emotional malnutrition into their adult lives.
Thus, woefully ill-prepared for the challenges of marriage and parenting responsibilities, these young adults try to build their own families nonetheless. The adults from my son’s age down are generally skeptical about marriage. They have seen too many marriage vows broken, if not by their own parents, by aunts and uncles, cousins, grandparents, and others. The state of family in America is worse than even divorce statistics suggest. We speak of the awful 50% divorce rate that has remained pretty steady for the past two or three decades. These divorce statistics do not factor in this fact: more and more people have chosen to just cohabit through these recent decades and the rate of demise of these relationships is not factored in (when there is no marriage, there is no divorce).
Consider another dynamic of the breakdown of families over these recent decades. The children from these broken homes were often given “stuff” by parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles to compensate for the fact that they weren’t given what they really needed – a secure, loving home. Many of these young people have been conditioned to be materialistic in this process. Contrary to the words of Jesus, these people actually believe that life does consist in the abundance of things.
All of these circumstances have become so common that a high percentage of young people are directly affected. Because of that high percentage that are directly affected by family breakdown, most young people are indirectly affected. That is, even in solid families where divorce will not likely ever occur, children may experience fear that their parents might divorce. If Mom & Dad had an argument and are still not happy with each other a day or two later, divorce is not a bizarre thought for their child. So, I assure you that the security of what are in fact secure homes has been shaken by the fact that most of us have seen people divorce that we never thought would.
We have also witnessed an alarming rise of youth gangs. Though we don’t often hear it mentioned, this is a result of family breakdown. Many kids don’t feel like they belong at home, so gang membership seems to offer what they need but can’t find at home. Many of these kids have little or no relationship with their dad. They live with an exhausted and frustrated single mom. These kids may feel unloved and unwanted at home. Sometimes, they feel like a burden to the people who have to provide for them. They easily resent the adults who seem only to have demands of them, but are prepared to give very little of what matters most to the kid. Many kids from broken homes feel like nothing more than a poker chip in a hostile game between the parents.
The woes of public education are related to the breakdown of families, too. Politicians and educators like to tell us that the educational system needs to be fixed and that with more funds, but I tell you that it is the family that most needs to be fixed.
It is true that some students from strongly dysfunctional families actually flourish in the world of academia. These are some of the intellectually gifted kids who find in the school environment a place to shine and gain affirmation via performance. It is not unusual to find some of these kids named valedictorian or salutatorian of their classes. In contrast to these high-performing kids, however, are many other kids from these chaotic and painful families who struggle in the school environment. They struggle in both performance and motivation. I can tell you from personal experience that it is difficult to care about and apply oneself to the work required at school when you are stressed by stuff happening at home. Trust me, our schools are heavily populated with kids whose home-lives are so drama-filled that they have little motivation to do what, for them, naturally requires extra effort. We can keep throwing money at our schools, but we shouldn’t expect to see much positive change until we get as serious about fixing the family as we are about fixing the schools.
To “fix the family” in America is a huge task, in fact, too huge for you and me. It seems sufficiently challenging for me to “fix” my family. The task is beyond the role of government, too; although government certainly has a role in fixing the family. They could start by ceasing doing stuff that messes up families and perpetuates messed up families. For instance, they could stop siding with the people who want to make our public schools religion-free zones (except for secular humanism). They could allow students to be exposed to ideas like creationism and intelligent design. They could actively oppose the idea that men are only needed for their seed and their funds.
Fixing the family in America is a God-sized problem. What really is needed is a great revival among young people, a serious turning to the Lord and His ways. I keep hoping to see a host of young people who are ready to say “enough” with the social experiments of secularists. These would be young people who renounce the lie that all sex between “consenting adults” is acceptable. They would take courting very seriously, and marital vows even more seriously. They would seek godly wisdom for making a marriage and family work. And they would depend on God for strength to implement wisdom as they attempt to build a wholesome family. Fixing the family in America is really done one family at a time. I pray that you will invite God to help you build or rebuild a strong family. If America does not fix the family institution, at least you can participate in fixing of yours. And, if America does not fix the family, things will get worse in our land; but you will engage those worse things better in a better family. And therein lies real hope.
My oldest son turned 40 this past week. Yes, that makes me feel my age. Through Steve’s whole life, the institution of the family has been under assault in America. First, divorce has broken most marriages in his lifetime. And most of these broken marriages involved children. Many, if not most, of the people from the broken marriages with children eventually remarried. Thus, blended families (made up of children that are yours and mine, or yours, mine, and ours) have become commonplace over this 40 years.
Add to this social change the massive move of women into the workplace. When I grew up, it was common that moms were at home when the children were there. For the past decade or more, that situation has reversed. Now it is the exception rather than the rule that there is a stay-at-home parent. Don’t get me wrong here: I intend no assault on women who choose a career and children. Some parents juggle the responsibilities of two careers and family life pretty well. I personally know some who do. Still, it is no small challenge; and frankly, a high percentage of parents in these situations fail to adequately address the needs of their children. As a result, these children muddle their way through childhood and carry the damage of emotional malnutrition into their adult lives.
Thus, woefully ill-prepared for the challenges of marriage and parenting responsibilities, these young adults try to build their own families nonetheless. The adults from my son’s age down are generally skeptical about marriage. They have seen too many marriage vows broken, if not by their own parents, by aunts and uncles, cousins, grandparents, and others. The state of family in America is worse than even divorce statistics suggest. We speak of the awful 50% divorce rate that has remained pretty steady for the past two or three decades. These divorce statistics do not factor in this fact: more and more people have chosen to just cohabit through these recent decades and the rate of demise of these relationships is not factored in (when there is no marriage, there is no divorce).
Consider another dynamic of the breakdown of families over these recent decades. The children from these broken homes were often given “stuff” by parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles to compensate for the fact that they weren’t given what they really needed – a secure, loving home. Many of these young people have been conditioned to be materialistic in this process. Contrary to the words of Jesus, these people actually believe that life does consist in the abundance of things.
All of these circumstances have become so common that a high percentage of young people are directly affected. Because of that high percentage that are directly affected by family breakdown, most young people are indirectly affected. That is, even in solid families where divorce will not likely ever occur, children may experience fear that their parents might divorce. If Mom & Dad had an argument and are still not happy with each other a day or two later, divorce is not a bizarre thought for their child. So, I assure you that the security of what are in fact secure homes has been shaken by the fact that most of us have seen people divorce that we never thought would.
We have also witnessed an alarming rise of youth gangs. Though we don’t often hear it mentioned, this is a result of family breakdown. Many kids don’t feel like they belong at home, so gang membership seems to offer what they need but can’t find at home. Many of these kids have little or no relationship with their dad. They live with an exhausted and frustrated single mom. These kids may feel unloved and unwanted at home. Sometimes, they feel like a burden to the people who have to provide for them. They easily resent the adults who seem only to have demands of them, but are prepared to give very little of what matters most to the kid. Many kids from broken homes feel like nothing more than a poker chip in a hostile game between the parents.
The woes of public education are related to the breakdown of families, too. Politicians and educators like to tell us that the educational system needs to be fixed and that with more funds, but I tell you that it is the family that most needs to be fixed.
It is true that some students from strongly dysfunctional families actually flourish in the world of academia. These are some of the intellectually gifted kids who find in the school environment a place to shine and gain affirmation via performance. It is not unusual to find some of these kids named valedictorian or salutatorian of their classes. In contrast to these high-performing kids, however, are many other kids from these chaotic and painful families who struggle in the school environment. They struggle in both performance and motivation. I can tell you from personal experience that it is difficult to care about and apply oneself to the work required at school when you are stressed by stuff happening at home. Trust me, our schools are heavily populated with kids whose home-lives are so drama-filled that they have little motivation to do what, for them, naturally requires extra effort. We can keep throwing money at our schools, but we shouldn’t expect to see much positive change until we get as serious about fixing the family as we are about fixing the schools.
To “fix the family” in America is a huge task, in fact, too huge for you and me. It seems sufficiently challenging for me to “fix” my family. The task is beyond the role of government, too; although government certainly has a role in fixing the family. They could start by ceasing doing stuff that messes up families and perpetuates messed up families. For instance, they could stop siding with the people who want to make our public schools religion-free zones (except for secular humanism). They could allow students to be exposed to ideas like creationism and intelligent design. They could actively oppose the idea that men are only needed for their seed and their funds.
Fixing the family in America is a God-sized problem. What really is needed is a great revival among young people, a serious turning to the Lord and His ways. I keep hoping to see a host of young people who are ready to say “enough” with the social experiments of secularists. These would be young people who renounce the lie that all sex between “consenting adults” is acceptable. They would take courting very seriously, and marital vows even more seriously. They would seek godly wisdom for making a marriage and family work. And they would depend on God for strength to implement wisdom as they attempt to build a wholesome family. Fixing the family in America is really done one family at a time. I pray that you will invite God to help you build or rebuild a strong family. If America does not fix the family institution, at least you can participate in fixing of yours. And, if America does not fix the family, things will get worse in our land; but you will engage those worse things better in a better family. And therein lies real hope.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
